Asteriskhole

This is an idea I’ve had in my head for quite a while. Since my hope is that it’ll become irrelevant in less than two weeks, now’s the time that I finally have to draw it, if ever.

I thought it’d be a clever, visual way to comment on what a habitual liar Donald Trump is: the kind of overcompensating limp-dick whose nose would make Pinocchio look like post-cosmetic surgery Michael Jackson by comparison, and who couldn’t pass a polygraph even if there were a bomb attached to it; not to mention how his mouth often puckers like Kurt Vonnegut’s drawing of an asshole.

The symbol standing in for the B.H.mouth here is an asterisk, which culture broadly associates with disclaimers, misleading contracts, and general dishonesty, especially when placed alongside otherwise very simple, clear and direct statements like, “trust me.”

It’s like when someone says, “I’m not racist, but…” The asterisk is the “but.” Whatever follows can’t be good, and will probably even totally contradict the statement preceding it.

The last time I did an asterisk-based gag was all the way back in 2006, criticizing a similar unrepentant liar and brain-damaged, mass-murdering war criminal who Trump’s nominal opponents now gleefully embrace because they don’t actually stand for anything other than their own selfish, unscrupulous grasp of wealth and power. In the unfortunate event Trump lives for another 15-20 years instead of dropping dead before election day like he deserves, they’ll probably hug his depraved, stinky ass while complaining about the next step in Republican devolution, too.

The earlier gag was itself a reference to a cartoon former Cincinnati Enquirer cartoonist Jim Borgman did over 30 years ago about a previous Republican President/serial groper, George H.W. Bush, pointing out how his campaign promise, “Read my lips: no new taxes” turned out to be even bullshittier than his alibi for the day John F. Kennedy was assassinated.

Both Borgman’s cartoon and my cartoon from 2006 explicitly included the absurdly-detailed fine print referenced by the asterisk as part of the joke, but I think the context of the symbol makes that unnecessary, in this case. The reader can imagine whatever caveat they want, and thus fill the blank with something far more personal and meaningful than I could possibly have anticipated or invented.

Those with a little art history knowledge may recognize some Cubism influence on this illustration. That wasn’t entirely intentional, at least not from the outset. Initially, I was going to take a more traditional approach, but one of my very loose sketches sort of resembled Cubism or Art Deco. I thought it looked kind of interesting, would lock up well with the forms of the asterisk, and might be a fun change of pace, besides. Something about the style also seemed to fit the theme of duplicity, and research reminded me of Cubism’s evil, openly fascist cousin, Futurism, which certainly felt appropriate, given the circumstances.