This is Historic Times » Republican

Somebody Call The Whambulance

deephurting — Sat, 19 May 2012 06:54:58 +0000

Charity Cases

deephurting — Sun, 29 Apr 2012 03:54:21 +0000

Mitt Romney’s wife Ann was recently dispatched by her husband’s Presidential campaign to combat perceptions of a GOP “War on Women,” which arose after attempts by Republican legislators (on both State and Federal levels) to limit access to birth control, cut funding for women’s health, reverse decades-old abortion rights, and invade women’s bodies. The motives behind all these efforts were brought into plain focus by professional loudmouth Rush Limbaugh’s branding of Sandra Fluke with a Scarlet Letter back in March.

Ann and Mitt were made for each other (as their serial numbers would surely indicate). Much like when her husband tried to connect with the common man by referring to himself as unemployed and mentioning that some of his best friends own NASCAR teams, Ann tried to connect with the common woman by pointing out how she understood the plight of poor, working mothers in America, because I guess Mitt wouldn’t let her hire illegal immigrants to take care of the family’s laundry.

Do you have any idea how hard it is to raise five boys and dressage horses on a family income of only a quarter of a billion dollars? No?? Well then DON’T SCOFF Ann Romney’s choice to be a “stay-at-homes” mom!!

Choose Your Poison

deephurting — Sun, 08 Apr 2012 04:50:17 +0000

Max ROMney

deephurting — Sun, 01 Apr 2012 04:12:26 +0000

Boy, here’s a reference a lot of people aren’t likely to get.

I was watching this popular Youtube video about a week ago, and segment at the end with a bunch of Mitt Romneys on televisions screens made me realize that the candidate looks a lot like Max Headroom, the “computer-generated celebrity” from the 1980s Coca-Cola used as the pitchman for their disastrous New Coke product line. It struck me as a new way to make the at-this-point cliche “Mitt Romney is a robot” joke, and appropriate, since Max Headroom is today largely remembered as a symbol of 1980s commercialism due to the New Coke association.

It’s not a perfect metaphor: On his short-lived television series, Max was the A.I. counterpart of a reporter who exposed corruption. He also had a much more human-seeming personality than Romney does.

Humbugs

deephurting — Sun, 25 Mar 2012 04:12:35 +0000

The Incredible Cash Dummy

deephurting — Sun, 26 Feb 2012 04:07:53 +0000

This cartoon took way too long to produce. I started several different gags with which I became unsatisfied halfway-through and thusly scrapped, but even fine-tuning the background coloring of this one took an unusually long time, considering how little of it there actually is.

This was one of the gags I didn’t complete. I imagined it as a commentary on how much effort goes into making a political candidate’s speech and movements appear effortless and natural, while at the same time distracting from his or her faults. Romney’s a good jumping-off point for jokes about that because of how stiffly he continues to come across, even after millions of dollars’-worth and a lifetime of preparation. Other cartoonists have drawn parallels between the primary process and dating, and there are probably a few well-known cliches from that field relating to desperation and trying too hard which apply to Romney’s public persona.

Those of you old enough to have been paying attention for this long may remember similar criticisms of Al Gore during the 2000 election. He was frequently made fun of for being humorless or “robotic” going all the way back to his term as Bill Clinton’s Vice President–I remember a joke from The Simpsons in 1993 or ’94 that had Gore listening to that song that goes, “Celebrate good times… come on!” and replying in a monotone voice, “I will!” The irony of that is since then, Gore’s worked with some of the same writers and producers on several episodes of Futurama, and they’ve praised his performance and sense of humor on the DVD commentaries. I’ve also heard from several other people that the former V.P. is surprisingly loose and charming off-camera, in contrast to the woodenness of his political image.

Maybe my own memory’s just not that good, but I feel like Romney’s much worse off in this department than Gore ever was. His prepared remarks always sound awkward, and when forced to ad-lib or caught off-guard, his natural instincts appear to favor coldness, cruelty, and a very short temper.

Still, it’s better than whenever he tries to tell jokes…

Anyway, I had the idea to summarize Romney’s “stiffness” with a reference to the dummies used in crash tests for automobiles. It seemed appropriate, given that the Michigan primary fast approaches, and could be a make-or-break moment for the candidate: He grew up in the state, but his stronghold there has been weakened by abysmal debate performances and his own calls to “Let Detroit Go Bankrupt.”

The vehicle he’s driving here is a Cadillac Escalade, chosen because it’s considered symbolic of opulence and waste in popular culture, and I’m told Escalades are very unsafe, even compared to a lot of other SUVs.

Butthole Surfer

deephurting — Tue, 14 Feb 2012 14:00:42 +0000

Well now, this is one of the most disgusting images I’ve drawn in quite some time! But then again, Rick Santorum is a pretty disgusting person; moreso due to his political and “moral” views than that other thing his name represents.

The idea for this cartoon dates back to Santorum’s victory in the Iowa caucus, early last month. I thought it was funny enough at the time, but shelved it because I wasn’t sure Santorum’d manage to stick around for long afterwards. Fortunes can change rather quickly in the primary process, and I’ve had more than one cartoon’s relevance weakened, this cycle, by starting it while a candidate remained in the race, only to have him or her drop out hours before I finished.

Unbelievably, following a three-state sweep last week, Rick Santorum now appears to be a more serious contender for the Republican nomination than first thought. If Mitt Romney could feel feelings, he’d surely be pretty sad right about now–guy’s so disliked, he’s struggling to compete against a racist, serial adulterer; the racist pilot of a gold-plated Hindenburg; and a third racist who’s also such a flaming homophobe, people across the country united to officially redefine his last name as meaning this (no, I’m not gonna say it–most of you know what I mean, and it’s funnier to leave it implied for those who don’t).

Huh. I guess the average Republican would still rather vote for one of at least two wholly unlikable humans than for a corporation impersonating a human. Perhaps there’s hope for them, yet!

Most (if not all) of Santorum’s electoral victories so far have been in caucus states, rather than primaries which actually pledge any delegates. I realized, while writing this, how funny and oddly appropriate that is, considering the prominent anti-gay aspect of his candidacy, and what “caucus” sounds like, if you pronounce the second vowel with more of an æ sound. Caucus. Kawkæs.

Santorum.

Platforms

deephurting — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 21:07:23 +0000

While my own, personal feelings on the execution of Osama Bin Laden weren’t quite as black-and-white as most, it’s inarguable that it was a major political victory for the Obama Administration, from the perspective of the American electorate. This is why I find it ridiculous that practically every candidate in the Republican Primary (with the exception of Ron Paul) apparently insists on sticking with the ol’ Conservative standby, “[Democratic candidate] is weak on defense!”

Are they planning on using this line in the eventual debates with the President? All he has to do in response is hold up a copy of one of the most-viral images of 2011. It’d be like yielding the floor for Obama to crow about presiding over Bin Laden’s death in whatever terms he wants, except worse because at least the latter strategy might make him look like a braggart, as opposed to merely responding to his opponent.

The tradition of attacking Democrats for being “weak on defense” goes back to at least Reagan/Carter, and I figure it’s even as old as the Democratic tactic of calling Republicans dangerous warmongers. The truth is that Presidents from both parties have been excessively and overzealously attentive towards military force for far longer than I’ve been alive–a look at the “defense” portion of the federal budget clearly confirms that. Republicans on the campaign trail this cycle have asserted that Obama has cut the defense budget, which is not true: In fact, all his Administration has done (by request of the Pentagon itself, if I’m not mistaken) has been to ease back on the rate at which the defense budget will be allowed to grow. Growth, however, remains assured.

If the artwork in this cartoon looks any different, it’s because I got the stylus for my new Wacom back, which I’d previously left on a friend’s coffee table in Bellingham, Washington. I’m hoping this’ll eventually lead to a more painterly style in my coloring, though I am definitely still getting the hang of even the basics.

Hip to be Square

deephurting — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 00:41:25 +0000

It’s been a while since I did a longer, narrative-form cartoon, so I figured it was about time that I drew one. Apparently, I also figured it was about time that I do another piece that would never, ever get published in a traditional print outlet, even if any of them were running me!

The scene depicted in this cartoon is directly lifted from the film version of Bret Easton Ellis’s novel, American Psycho, which stars Christian Bale as a Wall Street businessman named Patrick Bateman who also happens to be a deranged serial killer. Early on in the movie, Bateman has a professional rivalry with an associate named Paul Allen (played by Jared Leto), which comes to a head when Allen manages to get a reservation at an exclusive restaurant where Bateman is snubbed. So, to settle the score, Bateman gets Allen drunk and then chops him to pieces with an axe while delivering a long-winded speech about how much he loves Huey Lewis & The News.

Those who follow my Twitter feed may have noticed me making a comparison between Republican Presidential candidate Mitt Romney and Patrick Bateman a few weeks ago. I got the idea after seeing this infamous photograph of Romney and his cohorts at Bain Capital, which has made the rounds on the news media for awhile as a graphic underscore for how out-of-touch Romney is with humans who aren’t absurdly rich. I thought it was funny and appropriate that Romney looked so similar to Christian Bale as Patrick Bateman during the era in which American Psycho is set–even down to the sadistic look in his eyes.

Bateman’s murderous rampage is a metaphor for (among other things) the self-serving, amoral greed systemic to the ’80s thanks to the efforts of Ronald Reagan and other contemporary Republicans who were the ideological progenitors of most free-market Conservatives and Neo-liberals infesting the US government today–the movie makes this criticism of Reaganomics clear by featuring a clip of the President speaking on a TV in the background during its final moments. This was the environment in which Mitt Romney’s corporate fortune first germinated, and then flourished; the economic equivalent of a slaughterhouse where money is Soylent Green, and Soylent Green is people.

While I’m surely not the first person to make the connection between Romney and Bateman–it’s just too obvious not to have been discovered already–I expect I’m the only editorial cartoonist to illustrate it. Few others seem to have either the stomach for the film’s graphic level of violence and gore, or the courage to skewer public figures like Romney with such pointed language. Of those that do, most would correctly realize such a cartoon’d be rejected by their employers and publishers, and therefore choose not to waste the time drawing it, but as already mentioned above, that’s not really an issue in my case, so the only practical concern for me is a question of whether or not the commentary has the depth to offset the gratuity of the violence, the obscurity of the reference, and the scale of the drawing effort.

Admittedly, it probably doesn’t, but I still went ahead because I thought it’d be funny, as well as an enjoyable, rewarding drawing exercise. It definitely fulfilled those expectations, even if it does have less intellectual value than I usually try to be certain about including.

Mitt Robbery

deephurting — Sun, 22 Jan 2012 04:49:02 +0000

A report, released earlier this week, revealed that Mitt Romney (as well as the investment firm he ran, Bain Capital) keeps a portion of his vast personal fortune in offshore tax shelters on the Cayman Islands. The Cayman Islands are a bit of a pop-culture cliche when it comes to the subject of tax evasion–frequent viewers of the Simpsons, for example, may recall a humorous telephone conversation between the Springfield police and a man in the Caymans working on behalf of Krusty the Clown, who at one point said, “I’m afraid I can’t divulge any information about that customer’s secret, illegal account.”

It just goes to support my theory that, while modest wealth can perhaps be had and maintained honestly, no one ever got to the ultra-wealthy column and remained there without doing unethical things or outright breaking the law at some point. The above-noted article quotes a tax expert who estimates that havens in places like the Caymans cost the federal government $100 billion dollars annually, so you could say that at least part of Mr. Romney’s fortune is based on (indirectly) reaching into the pockets of every taxpayer in America and stealing their change. In fact, it’s worse than that–this kind of robbery also affects everyone in America too poor to pay taxes, since it deprives the government of money that could otherwise be put towards social services for the unemployed, as well as the elderly, the infirm, and the handicapped, not to mention funding for infrastructure, postal services, fire departments, police…

Anyway, I thought there might be something to the idea of Romney swiping tax dollars, so I sketched a couple of different approaches to the concept before hitting on the image of a getaway car in a bank robbery. I changed the car to a boat, so it’d more easily play into the idea of escaping to the Caymans, and modeled the boat in my final illustration on one belonging to notorious gangster Al Capone, whose own tax fraud ultimately led to his conviction and imprisonment.